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Post by Shymmex on Dec 16, 2015 0:08:28 GMT
Interloper, Moffy, OmoOba, Iya Niyen!, Omoluabi, dansoye1, Belmot, osoronga,@quimicababes, Her Highness, oduabachanal, zaynie, Honorebu, AgbongboAkala, What do you lot think about this and should the man automatically become the head of the family?
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Post by IrekeOnibudo on Dec 16, 2015 0:21:20 GMT
Interloper , Moffy , OmoOba , Iya Niyen! , Omoluabi , dansoye1 , Belmot , osoronga ,@quimicababes , Her Highness , oduabachanal , zaynie , Honorebu , AgbongboAkala , What do you lot think about this and should the man automatically become the head of the family? In my opinion, this is an expectation that most women have. The man has to take on responsibilities befitting of a titular head, in the very least, but in an understated way.
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Post by Shymmex on Dec 16, 2015 0:30:57 GMT
Interloper , Moffy , OmoOba , Iya Niyen! , Omoluabi , dansoye1 , Belmot , osoronga ,@quimicababes , Her Highness , oduabachanal , zaynie , Honorebu , AgbongboAkala , What do you lot think about this and should the man automatically become the head of the family? In my opinion, this is an expectation that most women have. The man has to take on responsibilities befitting of a titular head, in the very least, but in an understated way. However, "modern women" don't believe in that structure, especially feminists.
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Post by Deleted on Dec 16, 2015 0:38:37 GMT
I have no problem if the guy is the head but the guy have to come real good....I have to be able to trust his decision making skills and so forth...I am not exactly the submissive time...to me lets both respect each other and yea Shymmex I have feminist leanings @especially feminists lmaooooooooooo
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Post by Shymmex on Dec 16, 2015 0:47:57 GMT
I have no problem if the guy is the head but the guy have to come real good....I have to be able to trust his decision making skills and so forth...I am not exactly the submissive time...to me lets both respect each other and yea Shymmex I have feminist leanings @especially feminists lmaooooooooooo Feminist alert!! But don't you think men naturally have the temperament to be in-charge of decision making, since they're wired that way and most men were raised from a young age to take charge?
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Post by Deleted on Dec 16, 2015 0:53:36 GMT
I have no problem if the guy is the head but the guy have to come real good....I have to be able to trust his decision making skills and so forth...I am not exactly the submissive time...to me lets both respect each other and yea Shymmex I have feminist leanings @especially feminists lmaooooooooooo Feminist alert!! But don't you think men naturally have the temperament to be in-charge of decision making, since they're wired that way and most men were raised from a young age to take charge? Lmaooooooooooooo....nope I don't especially with Black guys.Plenty guys make poor decisions and suck at decision making.Do I think female fair better?...nope.I can only speak for me o...whatever decisions I make I am willing to live with it and I am fairly dispassionate when making decisions.If I think I can trust the guy with making proper and logical decisions I no dey have any problem making him take control but if he can't mek.....errr mek I make my own decisions o.
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Post by Shymmex on Dec 16, 2015 0:59:59 GMT
Feminist alert!! But don't you think men naturally have the temperament to be in-charge of decision making, since they're wired that way and most men were raised from a young age to take charge? Lmaooooooooooooo....nope I don't especially with Black guys.Plenty guys make poor decisions and suck at decision making.Do I think female fair better?...nope.I can only speak for me o...whatever decisions I make I am willing to live with it and I am fairly dispassionate when making decisions.If I think I can trust the guy with making proper and logical decisions I no dey have any problem making him take control but if he can't mek.....errr mek I make my own decisions o. Bwahahahahaha. Obviously, even if the man is the head, based on the consciousness of the world today and paradigm shift, it's going to be more of brainstorming and team work - than a dictatorial headship. Perhaps similar to what's attainable in a team, with a team leader. So if that were to be the case - would you still have problems with the man being the head?
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Post by Deleted on Dec 16, 2015 1:08:17 GMT
Lmaooooooooooooo....nope I don't especially with Black guys.Plenty guys make poor decisions and suck at decision making.Do I think female fair better?...nope.I can only speak for me o...whatever decisions I make I am willing to live with it and I am fairly dispassionate when making decisions.If I think I can trust the guy with making proper and logical decisions I no dey have any problem making him take control but if he can't mek.....errr mek I make my own decisions o. Bwahahahahaha. Obviously, even if the man is the head, based on the consciousness of the world today and paradigm shift, it's going to be more of brainstorming and team work - than a dictatorial headship. Perhaps similar to what's attainable in a team, with a team leader. So if that were to be the case - would you still have problems with the man being the head? Nope I won't....as I said,I have no problem if a guy is the head of the household.The thing is some guys think to be head means he is a dictator and whatever he says goes lol.I can't gel with that because a lot of Black guys suck at making decisions.Teamwork I am game for but a guy bossing over me and ish....make him park well o cuz I don't try to control folks so I don't want it for me. Let us both respect ourselves and have both of our voices be heard and come to a consensus where decisions are concern.I have only met one guy I ever trusted when it comes to making decisions and I never had a problem...thing is the guy argued his points based on superior arguments etc and not him being a "man".Once you can convince me your course of action or choices is better than mines...I am game.
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Post by Shymmex on Dec 16, 2015 1:13:23 GMT
Bwahahahahaha. Obviously, even if the man is the head, based on the consciousness of the world today and paradigm shift, it's going to be more of brainstorming and team work - than a dictatorial headship. Perhaps similar to what's attainable in a team, with a team leader. So if that were to be the case - would you still have problems with the man being the head? Nope I won't....as I said,I have no problem if a guy is the head of the household.The thing is some guys think to be head means he is a dictator and whatever he says goes lol.I can't gel with that because a lot of Black guys suck at making decisions.Teamwork I am game for but a guy bossing over me and ish....make him park well o cuz I don't try to control folks so I don't want it for me. Let us both respect ourselves and have both of our voices be heard and come to a consensus where decisions are concern.I have only met one guy I ever trusted when it comes to making decisions and I never had a problem...thing is the guy argued his points based on superior arguments etc and not him being a "man".Once you can convince me your course of action or choices is better than mines...I am game. Fair enough. Err, why do you think black guys suck at decision making and do you think other races of people are better than black guys in that regard?
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Post by Her Highness on Dec 16, 2015 1:25:34 GMT
Shymmex, I'm gonna have to sit this one out
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Post by Deleted on Dec 16, 2015 1:26:29 GMT
Nope I won't....as I said,I have no problem if a guy is the head of the household.The thing is some guys think to be head means he is a dictator and whatever he says goes lol.I can't gel with that because a lot of Black guys suck at making decisions.Teamwork I am game for but a guy bossing over me and ish....make him park well o cuz I don't try to control folks so I don't want it for me. Let us both respect ourselves and have both of our voices be heard and come to a consensus where decisions are concern.I have only met one guy I ever trusted when it comes to making decisions and I never had a problem...thing is the guy argued his points based on superior arguments etc and not him being a "man".Once you can convince me your course of action or choices is better than mines...I am game. Fair enough. Err, why do you think black guys suck at decision making and do you think other races of people are better than black guys in that regard? Honestly...its not a black guy issue but a black people issue.Both sexes make utterly terrible decisions....we dey for lalaland and don't deal with the reality of life and social dynamics in this culture.Black people can be quite emotional o relative to other races and no I don't think we as a race are inferior to others.... I do think other races are better at making decisions as many times they think long term as opposed to short term both as a family and as a racial group.Many times our decisions are in the now and not how what we do affect future generations and so forth....
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Post by Omoluabi on Dec 16, 2015 4:19:03 GMT
Bwahahahahaha. Obviously, even if the man is the head, based on the consciousness of the world today and paradigm shift, it's going to be more of brainstorming and team work - than a dictatorial headship. Perhaps similar to what's attainable in a team, with a team leader. So if that were to be the case - would you still have problems with the man being the head? Nope I won't....as I said,I have no problem if a guy is the head of the household.The thing is some guys think to be head means he is a dictator and whatever he says goes lol.I can't gel with that because a lot of Black guys suck at making decisions.Teamwork I am game for but a guy bossing over me and ish....make him park well o cuz I don't try to control folks so I don't want it for me. Let us both respect ourselves and have both of our voices be heard and come to a consensus where decisions are concern.I have only met one guy I ever trusted when it comes to making decisions and I never had a problem...thing is the guy argued his points based on superior arguments etc and not him being a "man".Once you can convince me your course of action or choices is better than mines...I am game. I am in agreement with this post apart from the bold. I don't believe in Lording it over women or anybody for that matter. My child's opinion matters how much more my wife's? We Africans are taught from a young age that the man or the daddy is always correct but that can't be possible in real life. There are times you have to agree you don't know everything
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Post by Shymmex on Dec 16, 2015 9:07:47 GMT
Shymmex , I'm gonna have to sit this one out Loool. But are you a traditional African woman or a feminazi? I know the big Honorebu loves 'em traditional lol.
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Post by Shymmex on Dec 16, 2015 9:17:10 GMT
Fair enough. Err, why do you think black guys suck at decision making and do you think other races of people are better than black guys in that regard? Honestly...its not a black guy issue but a black people issue.Both sexes make utterly terrible decisions....we dey for lalaland and don't deal with the reality of life and social dynamics in this culture.Black people can be quite emotional o relative to other races and no I don't think we as a race are inferior to others.... I do think other races are better at making decisions as many times they think long term as opposed to short term both as a family and as a racial group.Many times our decisions are in the now and not how what we do affect future generations and so forth.... Interesting input about long term and short term dichotomy and how we Africans live for the moment/now vis a vis other races of people. I think that right there is the reason why we are at the bottom of the totem pole of everything. A wise man once said if you fail to plan, then you are planning to fail. Err, do you think we are like cos it is a cultural thing or due to the psychological effects of being an oppressed group for so long, and subconsciously that has innately affected every facet of our mentality and outlook to life. Thus making us making us short term thinkers cos we innately don't care about building gradually? Also, how did you come to this conclusion? Have you dated guys from other races?
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Post by Shymmex on Dec 16, 2015 9:29:13 GMT
Nope I won't....as I said,I have no problem if a guy is the head of the household.The thing is some guys think to be head means he is a dictator and whatever he says goes lol.I can't gel with that because a lot of Black guys suck at making decisions.Teamwork I am game for but a guy bossing over me and ish....make him park well o cuz I don't try to control folks so I don't want it for me. Let us both respect ourselves and have both of our voices be heard and come to a consensus where decisions are concern.I have only met one guy I ever trusted when it comes to making decisions and I never had a problem...thing is the guy argued his points based on superior arguments etc and not him being a "man".Once you can convince me your course of action or choices is better than mines...I am game. I am in agreement with this post apart from the bold. I don't believe in Lording it over women or anybody for that matter. My child's opinion matters how much more my wife's? We Africans are taught from a young age that the man or the daddy is always correct but that can't be possible in real life. There are times you have to agree you don't know everything You are a great dad and when I grow up, I want to be like you lol. Most dads, especially African dads, don't understand the fact that being a dad and the head of the family doesn't make one infallible. That's basically the problem I had with my dad growing up and I never liked him too tough, regardless of how much sacrifices he made. You think you know it all, know what is good for everyone without their inputs, and can do it all by yourself - it is problematic. And that can create a sort of dissonance within the family structure. I started get along with him when I got into Uni and afterwards had to start existing as a man. You know once you get into the real world and see how tough it's on these streets to be a man - you would have no other choice than to love, respect, and adore the one who sired you. But I think a lot of dads need to do better and get in tune with today's consciousness. Not saying men should become weaklings and subscribe to the toxic feminism tripe - but family structure has to be about team work and brainstorming.
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